Jem and the Holograms (2015)

So the film version of the classic 80s cartoon Jem and the Holograms is a thundering historical bomb of a movie. Last weekend, of the top 10 highest grossing movies, it was number 15 and became the lowest grossing first weekend movie to ever open on more than 2000 screens. It also angered fans of the original show (of which I am not one) by having very little to do with it other than be about a female musical act. And, for those of us not in the fan club, the trailer looked like every music movie ever (will the band break up? Will the lead singer go solo? Oh noes!).

So I decided to go see this movie and find out for myself if it – at a 2 hour running time – was really that bad. And I’m here to disappoint you by saying, I can’t trash this movie. It’s fine. It’s a perfectly harmless film / fantasy for (mostly) teens and tweens. See Jem and her friends find super stardom by just posting a YouTube video, see them get a fashion makeover, see them put up in a huge mansion in Hollywood, see them walk the run carpet, etc. It’s a massive dose of stardom fantasy but it’s not specifically bad. It’s just… fine.

And I’m so far out of the target demographic, I was just hoping the moms and their daughters in the audience thought I worked at the theater. But I’ll say this much for the target demo… leaving the theater, a mom and her two little girls were ahead of me and those girls were dancing around in their sparkly boots and having fun. So, yeah, if you are a ten year old girl, this might be the best movie ever.

To discerning adults, sure, it’s riddled with cliches and has to have the “will the band break up because Jem is going solo” stuff but sometimes a movie can be perfectly pleasant and you roll with the cliches because everything else in the flick could be so much worse.

So, yeah, overall this is a decent movie that you should take your kids to see if they have any interest. It’s meant for them and for folks outside the target demo, it’s not a bad version of this movie you’ve kind of seen before. I had what could be approximately called fun watching it. I’ll admit that. 🙂

Score: 81