Hello, Goodbye, and Everything In Between (which has an Oxford Comma, Letterboxd… just sayin’) is a teen romance featuring two pretty bland teens who fall in like over the summer before college. She’s not so much into long-term, he’s very much into long-term. Will he convince her of their (alleged) amazing, blazing love or will she say goodbye?

“Say goodbye”, I chanted. The problem with this film (or maybe the problem is with me) is that I wanted these two anti-interesting people to just break up. That’s what they agreed to and there was nothing about either of them individually and certainly nothing in their chemistry together that made me think she should change her mind.

And, in fact, his desperate attempts to make it work and her obvious – glowing-like-a-thousand-nuclear-weapons-exploding-at-once levels of obvious – disinterest made me want to remind him that no means no. Just…. go away. Shoo. Be clingy somewhere else, you wet noodle of a character.

Not that she’s much more interesting… her only kernel of depth is that she’s so anti-romance in a romance film. So why wouldn’t I want her one defining characteristic to win out?

This flick isn’t terrible but it certainly lacks any zest beyond my annoyance at their bumbling romance. I credit maybe decent acting and pretty locations? I dunno. Their first date was kind of cute? Sure, we’ll go with that.

Which, all said, makes this one bumbling failure of a movie. Unless it really did want me to root against them… in which case, hell yeah! Five stars, baby!

Score: 70