Yoga Hosers

Checked out the latest Kevin Smith film Yoga Hosers. This is a semi-sequel to his previous horror comedy Tusk (which I found very boring and confusing as to when it was trying to be funny). This is definitely more of a comedy in the vein of the post-Gremlins movies like Critters and Ghoulies… only instead of gremlins, critters, or ghoulies, we get bratzis… which are tiny bratwurst Nazis dressed as Canadian Mounties. Because… why not?
The film stars Harley Quin Smith (Kevin Smith’s daughter) and Lily Rose Depp (Johnny Depp’s daughter) as Canadian best friend convenience store clerks. Who like yoga? Is that a thing teenager girls (or Canadian teenage girls) are into? Well, regardless, they are the Yoga Hosers of the title and they, in deed, battle the underground forces of Canadian Nazis, returned from a bunker hidden under their convenience store these many years later.
This is a very dumb and silly film that almost dares you to judge it since it’s so knowingly corny. Everyone has the most silly, stereotypical overdone Canadian – and French Canadian – accents. The special effects are terrible and the action sluggish (Smith knows he’s not an action director but come on!). Johnny Depp shows up with a terrible accent and even worse facial hair (returning from Tusk) and Smith’s podcast buddy Ralph Garmon shows up to unpack his numerous but dated impressions. Then there are the bratzis… what can you say about tiny nazi bratwurst other than, “if you say so, guys.”
The funny thing is, the movie is so go-for-broke “I don’t care what people think, I’m gonna make a throw-back comedy horror movie for teenage girls” that it’s almost admirable how dumb and corny it is. Did I laugh? Yeah, sometimes I did. Did I think this was a good movie? No, but at least it wasn’t trying to be a good movie. I hope. So I kind of came away enjoying it. I guess when you no longer care to amuse audiences, your ability to just chuck stuff at the wall and see what sticks is kinda admirable.
What can I say? Don’t see it. Or do. Its out on iTunes and disc now after a very limited theatrical run that basically just confused the critics who saw it. I enjoyed it for what it was even though I can’t really recommend it to anyone in particular. Maybe Smith completionists or people who think Canada is just inherently silly.
Score: 70

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