Velvet Buzzsaw

Checked out the new Netflix Original art scene satire / horror movie Velvet Buzzsaw. Not a movie on my radar; didn’t see the trailer, gave it a shot based on some simmering buzz.
 
Wasn’t pleased by the result. It’s kind of an overlong drag of a film that can’t decide if it’s a (not very original) satirical take down of the art scene or a horror movie where the concept of art kills terrible people. I mean, it’s intentionally both… but it spends so much more time being the art satire that, by the time it wanders around to being a horror film, the horror stuff seems like an afterthought. But one that you have to spend too much of the final half hour muddling through.
 
The premise of the film is that there are way too many terrible characters who are either art dealers, art critics, or artists. One of them stumbles upon a treasure trove of art from an unknown artist who wanted his painting destroyed. Instead, they are put on display and sold. Thus angering the spirit of art… that art isn’t for money.. or maybe the spirit of revenge… or maybe just the spirit of ironic kills. Who knows. The movie doesn’t.
 
The first hour or so about the art scene isn’t bad, even though what it’s saying about art isn’t super original. But the actors are good and some of the scenes are decent. It’s not a win, but it would be a better movie if it ended there. Instead, it has to be this two hour mashup horror film where the rules of the horror elements are vague and the kills aren’t scary. And they make you ask more questions than not. It’s a little confused, without going into spoilery detail.
 
Overall, this is a swing and a miss. I guess it tries real hard but it really needed to be edited down from two hours. Maybe just an hour-long Black Mirror or even 30 minute Twilight Zone would have gotten you to the point faster and given a few earned scares. This film just didn’t work; it needed a few more passes on the screenplay or in the editing room.
Score: 67