You wanna know how lazy Hitpig(!) is? It’s about a bounty hunter pig… which is not a hitpig at all. It’s like they started with a title, realized an assassin pig wouldn’t work for the five year olds, but didn’t … Continue reading
Hold onto your butts… I don’t want to blow your minds or anything, but The Mouse Trap – the Steamboat Willie/Mickey Mouse is in the Public Domain exploitation flick – is a pretty shitty movie. Yes, this is the sad … Continue reading
You know, it’s a weird world when a terrible spoof movie like Not Another Church Movie name drops and even worse terrible spoof movie like Meet the Blacks… and I realize, you know, Church Movie is bad… but not as … Continue reading
So I did this one to myself… I knew the reputation of Poolman as an ego-driven stinker which actually made me curious. Could it, indeed, be as bad as they say? Yes. Yes it can. Poolman stars Captain Kirk (I … Continue reading
A movie where every actor is worse than the last and every line delivery needed a second or third take. Kill Craft is real amateur hour walking. I rented it because I liked the premise and hoped for a hidden … Continue reading
The only reason I didn’t give this flick a half star is that I realized afterword that the ugly yellow mustache Garfield has isn’t unique to the movie. I hate hate hate how its animated in this flick but since … Continue reading
Mark this, my movie watching brothers and sisters, for this is the day where America, nay the world, gains the moral high ground in the long war for who is most responsible for bad cinema. My friends, it is no … Continue reading
Beautiful Wedding is the unexpected sequel to the pretty bad – but campy – Beautiful Disaster. Not sure who was asking for a sequel but sometimes chumps like me fall for it… so… I guess the producers? This one follows … Continue reading
Gods of the Deep is a Lovecraft-inspired film about the discovery of an undersea portal beneath Antarctica and the team of scientists who investigate. Once their dubious sub enters, they discover.. well.. check out the poster art, I guess. It’s … Continue reading
Last Night at Terrace Lanes is horror film where masked cultists descend upon a bowling alley on its closing night. The survivors have to scramble and use their knowledge of the facility to survive and fight back. Horror Die Hard … Continue reading