Because I was secretly kidnapped by a top anti-cinema terrorists working out of Peru, I was forced at gunpoint to see the kiddie talking dog movie Show Dogs. Strapped to a hand truck with a face mask strapped to my face, I was rolled into the theater and forced to endure this terrible film.
The plot of Show Dogs is Will Arnett and a talking dog must enter a dog show to uncover an international gang of panda smugglers. Even at the level of “just for kids” movies, this is terrible. I’d say, “If you have young children, then maybe you should just take them to anything else. Rent something. Give them crayons and let them draw on your walls.”
The movie is just bad… unfunny… repetitive, dragged out to barely reach 80 minutes of crime fighting dogs with animated mouths. But, hey, if you want four Turner and Hooch jokes (note: NOT a talking dog movie), then you are clearly too old for the movie and should probably hope Interpol rescues you in time.
That’s it. I’m not done talking about this garbage and the level of effort nobody put into it. Shame on them. Bad dog. BAD. DOG.
Score: 56